Your Marriage. How Firm a Foundation?

While each and every relationship requires work, a happy marriage requires a whole lot more work. Marriages may look easy from the outside, but those couples that make it look easy know better.

Frequently newly wed couples are shocked at how much work is needed for the marriage to thrive. While they may accept the trials and responsibilities of a business relationship or parenting responsibilities, they often naively look at their married union as an oasis free from the trials and stresses of everyday life.

Oh, if the honeymoon could last forever! But soon reality squeezes into the marriage and the couple discovers that romance needs to be partnered with a solid foundation upon which to base the longevity of their union.

Here are a few tips to help you begin to build your marriage on a foundation that will withstand the pulls and tugs of life.

1. Handle the past. Past relationships can be a delicate subject. Often it is wise to let the past remain in the past. But if there are issues you need to air out, do so. Just clear the air and move on. 
2. Put your agreements and disagreements behind you. It is not just old boyfriends and old girlfriends that can cause you friction. You and your beloved can do that all by yourselves. Make it a point to resolve past differences. Forgive and forget. Yeah, FORGET.
3. Make plans for the future. Make plans - but don't chisel them in stone! Their needs to be give and take with your future hopes and dreams. Be patient and flexible. Don't be a doormat but show some consideration to your spouse.
4. Enjoy the present. Happy marriages are filled with happy moments. Many only happen once- a child's first words, his or her first steps. Treasure the present. We are not guaranteed the future.

The path you take in your marriage can be chosen consciously or happen by accident. While some spontaneity is good, planning and old fashioned hard work are key ingredients to almost any happy marriage recipe.

Is There A Magical Way To Get Your Boyfriend Back?

If you have tried everything else to get your boyfriend back maybe you have now desperately turned to magic.

Abracadabra! Boyfriend, re-appear!

That didn't work to well, did it?

The good news is while you do not need to call on the black arts to bring your old beau back, you can make your own life a little more magical. You can follow a few simple steps to cause him to "magically" become interested - and aroused - once again!

It's really just a matter of adding a little sparkle to you life and a little confidence to your roll. That will engage his curiosity and  rekindle the old romantic feelings.

Here are a few suggestions.

1. Why not get into the best shape of your life. Do it for yourself, not him. Whether you want to lose a few extra pounds or tone and tighten your physique, you'll look and feel better the next time you cross paths with lover boy.
2. Move on. Do not wait around for him. To give yourself the best chance of getting back together and working things out you have to be willing to move on. He will come to his senses and realize how much he needs you in his life.
3. Let him figure out he needs you without you pressuring him. 

There really is no magic in giving yourself the best chance of getting your relationship restored. Just some simple, tested steps that have worked over and over for others that found themselves in the same situation as you are now in. You can get back together with your boyfriend. To Learn More About The Steps Needed To Get Back Together, Click Here!

What You Must Do To Get Him Back .... And Stop Listening To Your Girlfriends So Much!

How can I win back my boyfriend? My girlfriends offer advice but it never seems to help. I know they have my back but I need to be steered in another direction. - Wounded in Wylo, Susanna.

Susanna,
You are correct in realizing that your girlfriend can steer you in the wrong direction. It is intentional, sure. But their well meaning advice could even be steering you in a completely wrong direction.

It is heartbreaking and very difficult to breakup with your boyfriend. It seems all you can think of is getting him back.

Girlfriend can be a great comfort in these trying times. They can listen and give you a shoulder to shed tear upon. They care about you and can help you get through long days and lonely nights.

They want to sincerely help you and offer the best advice they know. But there is one big problem.

The advice they offer is based on a female point of view. It is based on the rules girls play by. And those guidelines can prove very ineffective when you want to get back together with your boyfriend.

You need to know the Boy's Rules. 

1) Never let him see you coming. Your number one priority right now is to get him back. That means you have to dedicate yourself to the task. But, you have to do it in a way that doesn’t look like you’re trying to get him back. Don’t show your hands because he’ll constantly be watching and waiting for you to make your move.

2) Show the world you’ve moved on. This includes your girlfriends. Smile. Go out and join the crowd. Fake it until you have everyone convinced that you truly have moved on.

3) Let him know you’ve got game. All the time that you’re trying to show everyone you’ve moved on, you need to invest in making yourself over from the inside out. Become the stronger, more independent woman you’ve always wanted to be. Get a makeover. Change your hair style. Learn to walk in those six-inch heels guys love so much. Become confident in your own skin. Once you’ve accomplished all this – then you let him see you coming and watch the fireworks as he takes in the new you.

Why is this so Effective?

In relationships, you often begin to take each other for granted. The more you learn about each other, the fewer mysteries there are to uncover. You’re presenting him with a whole new you and many more mysteries to unlock. It’s a curious mystery he’s powerless to resist – especially if there ever were genuine feelings on his part. And your girlfriends? They love you regardless of whether you take their advice or not.

Are Your Irreconcilable Differences Really Ireconcilable?

"Irreconcilable Differences" ... It is such an unnatural buzz phrase that has seemingly become so fashionable in our modern world. It is something to hide behind in many instances. Something to keep from saying in plain English just what the problems are.

I suspect that many of the married folk that are heading to divorce are summing up the failure of their marriage behind this vague term. But are the differences really so irreconcilable or has divorce just simply become the path of least resistance and the easy way out for a stale marriage?

Maybe your marriage has been stamped "IRRECONCILABLE" and is heading for divorce. But perhaps you have a quiet voice in your soul that whispers, " It is not so."

If this describes you, perhaps it is time to step back from the divorce march and re-access your marriage. Is it worth saving? Are the difference really irreconcilable? Or can the marriage be saved?

She Says She Wants a Divorce - What You Can Do To Stop It

This time you have really done it, right? You screwed up badly and she is fed up and wants to divorce you! She is tired of being treated like a "second class citizen". She is tired of your controlling ways. She says that she is sick of all your stuff and tired of having to deal with you. She is so fed up that she is threatening to dissolve the marriage.

But you do not want that. You want desperately to stay together and work things out. But how do you turn things around and convince her to stop the divorce plans? All the things you are trying now are not working, are they? This article will highlight a few methods and strategies that you can employ in order to give you a better chance to stop the divorce.

First, let's take a look at the type of things that just don't work when the marriage has become this broken. Sending flowers or saying, "I love you", are usually regarded as empty and manipulative gestures at this point. Such superficial actions can just cause continued resentment. They will just cause her to resist any changes in her present attitude.

Another ineffectual way of trying to restore the relationship is to tell your wife that you will change your behavior. You can expect her to meet this re-assurance with disbelief and even contempt. Talk is cheap and you had better believe she knows it!

The issue in your marriage is one of control. Whether you mean to or not, you have become controlling and even manipulative. You have not given your wife equal footing in the marriage. She has a need to be listened to and respected. For whatever reason, this need is not being met.... and it is getting old, real fast!

In order to stop the divorce talk, she needs to change her mind. Get it - she needs to change her mind. Any attempts by you to change her mind for her will only be met with resistance. You need to give her the time and space she needs to work things out. Be agreeable and sincere with her. Show her you respect and value her opinion. Cease all the controlling behaviors of the past and allow her to be a full and equal partner. That is how it always should have been anyway.

If you have been guilty to dominating and controlling your wife, stop it. If you want to stop going down the road to divorce, start treating her with sincere respect. It will yield more results than empty words and a room full of flowers.