Can You Save Your Marriage After An Affair ?

Most marriages do not survive a discovered affair and end because of it. An inability to trust is the main reason why even couples that still love each other very much are unable to put the affair behind them and move forward with the marriage.

Having the trust of your marriage betrayed by the spouse you have loved and trusted makes overcoming the betrayal extremely difficult. If you want to save your marriage despite this breech of trust understand that you are in for a difficult and time consuming process.

If you have now decided to try and save the marriage, the first thing you need to determine is why he or she strayed. Finding the real cause of the adultery enables you to determine whether it is something that can be repaired in the marriage. You need to determine you - as well as your spouse -are willing to do your part in trying to change things.

But why should I have to change? It may sound unfair and cruel that you should have to change anything. After all, you were not the one that had the affair! But some changes on your part may be a helpful dynamic in resolving some underlying issues. This is certainly not saying you are to blame in any way. It is just a recognition that it is going to take both you and your spouse working together to save your troubled marriage.

One thing only you can do is to forgive your husband or wife. This is a difficult action that will most likely take some time and soul searching on your part. It is crucial for you to be able to become able to truly forgive your spouse for the marriage to survive. Give yourself all the time and space you need for this. Do not allow your spouse to pressure you into a half-hearted forgiveness.

After you have forgiven your spouse, you both need to work together and spend time working on the underlying problems of your marriage. Had you began to neglect the marriage and take each other for granted? Had one or both of you grown tired of the relationship? Whatever the underlying problems, they need to be recognized - and resolved - by both of you. Do not hesitate to seek help and educational. Yours is not the first marriage to experience this harsh blow.

It may be helpful to think of this as a new, fresh relationship as you move forward. Maybe you need to begin at the beginning and get to know each other as you did when you were dating. There is hope for your marriage if you are determined to work together and save it.

Relationship Advice - Breakups Are Never Easy - How You Can Avoid Them

Whether you are the one initiating the breakup or the unfortunate one that is receiving the bad news, breaking up never is easy. When a relationship that once held high hopes and passion comes to a close it hurts to think of all the time and effort you spent in building the relationship. A broken relationship can leave you dealing with guilt, anger, depression or any of a number of negative emotions.

There are countless ways a relationship can unravel and come to an end. People change or they fail to change. When you are in a relationship, it is constantly evolving. It may be getting better or it may be getting worse. A relationship can crumble due to neglect or it can become suffocated by too much attention. Sometime two people just realize it is time to call it quits and mutually end the relationship on good terms.

While this paints a dismal picture, rest assured that not all relationships end up on the scrap heap. While all relationships are a challenge in one way or another, there are countless matches that have withstood the tests of time. There are just as many relationships that have endured their trails and ended up stronger than ever.

If you find your relationship on rocky shores, take stock. Decide whether it is time to call it quits or re-double your efforts to strengthen the union. Do not give up on a relationship too easily. They say "It is always darkest before the dawn", you know?

If you do decide to try and get back together after a break up, there are a few time tested rules you would be wise to follow. Probably the most important thing is to approach your ex from a strong position. Do not beg and grovel. Hold your head high. You should look strong and attractive to your ex. You want to get back together with a solid foundation for your future.

Another helpful strategy is to begin the relationship as a fresh one. Don't pick up the relationship from where it ended. Consider this a new relationship where you both need to win over each others affections anew. Many floundering relationships can be saved if only you avoid the common mistakes made by others. By having a game plan and following a course that gives you the best chance of happily getting back together, you can make your relationship better than ever.

Learn the Strategies to Get Back your Ex - Click Here!

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Does Your Partner Know What Your Relationship Needs Are? ... It's Important!

Did you know that having your needs met in a relationship is a strong indicator of the chances of that relationship lasting and being one filled with happiness? Well, when you put it that way... yes.

Not having your needs met is an obvious cause of relationship troubles. It is especially important if you and your partner have broken up in the past and managed to get back together again. Make sure that your partner is well aware what you need from the relationship this time around. And you should ask him or her what they need from the relationship.

It may take more than just asking about their needs but that is a start. You can not read their mind or make assumptions. Take time to get this right and your relationship will benefit greatly. Different people need different things from their relationships.

Because we want different things, it is important to not assume your partner wants the same things from your relationship that you do. For example, you may be the type of person that needs to hear how much your partner loves you. Because of this, you probably be quite generous with telling your partner how much you love him or her.

But perhaps your partner needs to be shown how much you love him or her through actions. You partner may feel that, " Words are cheap.", and value any little actions you take to show your love. People are naturally wired - it seems - to value different mode of expression. While one person yearns to hear or see how much you love them another person may need to see that love demonstrated.

There are several ways that you can find out the best way to show your love and meet your partners needs. You can often figure out the mode that is most important to them by observation and careful listening. If your partner tends to use visual words and expressions they make need to see how much you love them in order to feel that their needs are met. They may say, "I see what you mean" as opposed to "I hear that" or "I feel ya'" .

The words people use can often assist you in unlocking the combination that will let you satisfy the needs they want fulfilled in a relationship.

Is It Possible to Get Your Boyfriend Back - Even After He Has Broken Up With You?

Has your boyfriend ended his relationship with you? Has he called it quits? If you are currently
going through this type of break up, you are probably hurting and have lots of questions about why he chose to break up.

If you did not want to break up, you are undoubtedly asking yourself whether or not you can get back together with your now ex-boyfriend and restore the relationship. This is a difficult and emotional time. It is a time when you are not at your best when deciding your plans for the future.

While it may go against your desires and instincts the first thing you need to do is say away from your ex and give both him and yourself some time and space. Rushing back together or pestering and pleading are strategies that will not give you the results you want.

The break up could end up being over trivial and silly things. Or there may be more substantial issues behind it. You need to consider the situation and determine whether getting back together is possible - or desirable. It is too easy to let your heart overwhelm your reason and trap you into a relationship that is just no good for you.

After you have given yourself some time and perspective - and determined that the relationship is worthy salvation, there are some strategies you should think about employing to give yourself the best chance of getting back together.

The reconciliation should be on your terms. There are two reasons for this. First, by making your ex boyfriend put some effort in to getting back together you increase the chances of restoring the relationship on a more permanent and solid footing. If he knows that he can not just come and go as he pleases, he will not act so rashly in the future.

The second reason for conducting the reconciliation on your terms has to do with your self respect. If you allow yourself to be treated with no respect any relationship you have will be a dismal and desperate one. You will be more attractive in his mind if you convey your worth to him by demanding respect.

There are simple steps that you can take to get back together with an ex boyfriend. Often the complusions of the heart betray us at a time like this. It is better for us and the relationship to follow a time tested process that will help restore the relationship between you and your boyfriend and make that union stronger and happier than ever before. Learn more.

Dating Again But Still Thinking of Your Ex-boyfriend?

Have you started to date and still can not get your ex-boyfriend out of your mind? Do you find continually thinking about restarting your old relationship? If you have truly made an effort to move on but your feelings keep wandering back to the happy times you and your ex-boyfriend shared maybe you should try to re-kindle the sparks once again.

Here are some ideas you may want to try in order to get back together.

If you have made the decision to attempt to revive the old relationship, does it make any sense to give any energy to other dating relationships. Firmly resolve to not expend any time and energy with other men. If you are having trouble with this step it likely indicates you have not really made up your mind yet.

The next step involves how you pursue the relationship with your ex-boyfriend. There is a world of difference between a dignified pursuit of an adult relationship and a desperate, clingy attempt to get back together. Do not let yourself become his doormat. He will respect you for it and you will feel better about yourself. And acting in a mature and confident manner will make you more attractive in his eyes - and increase the chances of you two getting back together.

It is also a good idea to make this relationship a fresh relationship. What I mean is do different things than those that you did before. Do not go to the same old restaurants and the same old places. Strive to be imaginative and creative and bring some exciting new experiences into relationship 2.0

Try to look at things positively and leave old baggage in the past. While you should not put your head in the sand there is no reason you bring up trivial issues that can make being together a hassle. Encourage each other in the areas that need work and try not to get bogged down in minor details.

If getting back together with your ex-boyfriend is truly meant to be, putting in the thought and effort needed to rekindle the magic is well worth it. Take your time and build a solid foundation for your future happiness!